TORONTO, ONTARIO, CANADA

Canadian Customs was incredibly reluctant to allow me into the country. First agent was skeptical, second agent was frustrated and annoyed, third agent googled her and gave me dating advice. She was the small girl by the large column. I had been sweating for hours and hours, mostly in customs.
I tried to sleep on the plane. I’d been up drinking until 4am when I booked my hotel. If I hadn’t booked a hotel, they probably wouldn’t have let me in. Sleeping on the plane was nearly impossible though. The hotel shuttle took us to some strange hotel somewhere in the middle of airport semi-industrial nowhere, near the racetrack. Pretty much everywhere I’ve stayed has had a look like this:

We walked through the little shopping complex, a Tim Hortons (Canadian Starbucks), a fertility clinic, and 10 empty storefronts. That kind of place, always around that. The next hotel was the dirtiest and strangest I’ve ever seen. The enormous room with the stained carpets and the huge windows with tacky curtains with smelly hallways and back stairs that said ‘Fuck You’. I bought a knife and ate the spiciest potato chips ever, good job Canada. This hotel is far North basically in her little suburbtown, it’s much nicer than the other places and is comfortable; been watching too much food network though. Trying to get an airbnb place to stay downtown, but it’s all runaround so far as I can tell. She laughs very loudly.
Other good things:

It’s been raining more than snowing, and has only been incredibly cold on the days we ended up walking around.
The subway is almost silent.
The accents are completely entertaining (also Canadians LOVE cussing in fucking public).
I found a Mexican food restaurant that is on par with anything in the Southwest.
I haven’t felt sick too often.
        

Some not so great things:
Corona is 45CAD for a 24pack, and 5ths of american whiskey are about 40 dollars as well.
       
I have to leave by the 21st or I can be arrested and deported; customs gave me exactly 30 days, which is shitty and made me spend so much more money.
It does get Flagstaff cold but with more moisture in the air.

Running out of money and feel like a true consumer.




Toronto is pretty cool. The CN tower is out there somewhere

and it belongs to the dead.

Canada