She told him exactly what she felt. She was afraid. She was unconvinced and apprehensive, but invested. He was missing her, though right next to her. She told him all about her other boy coming to spend the week. And he wanted to cry and was angry.
“I want you,” she said slowly, “I want you.”
“Then why are you doing this?”
“Because I’m awful and selfish.” And she starts to cry.
“So stop.”
“No.”
“I shine! It’s all lies. A beautiful tapestry of deception, little miss.”
“What the hell is that supposed to mean?” He turned away a little, his head wobbling; she couldn’t see his face.
“It means: go fuck yourself.” He walked away laughing. He drank the last of the beer, and smashed down the bottle as hard as he could on the street. A big black car drove over the glass, and stopped abruptly. He ran up the road laughing.
He ran to a park, yelling all the way.
“When I was 16, I wasn’t afraid to die…now 16 year olds aren’t afraid to kill.”
“No one gives a shit.” Someone yelled back at him. He saw a light glowing in the grass of the park from his swing. And went to it. She walked up behind him. Had followed him and he looked at her and she was crying. She grabbed him in her arms and squeezed him tight, crying against his chest.
“I’m sorry, I’m so sorry. I promise you, I will be with you.”
“When you’re done fucking him? Or what?” He said looking away from her, forgetting the glow for a moment.
“Don’t say that,” she cried harder now, body convulsing against him. Then she saw it, and stopped crying and he looked down at her face and saw her looking at it and remembered it too.
Maybe it came from outer space and crashed there, or maybe it was ancient, no way to tell, something of both. It was bright and glowing, the little rock, with dark designs all over it, as black as all black. He picked it up.
“No, don’t.” She said. But it was too late, they were somewhere else all the sudden, like in space. But they could see everything when they looked in the stone, everything in the universe.
“Where are we?” she said crying.
THE MIRROR
They both dropped to their knees, the voice so loud.
“What does that mean?” he said trembling.
EVERYTHING
MAKE THE DECISION
“What is this, what does this mean?” She cried out.
EVERYTHING
The stone glowed again and they both looked, and saw two things at once.
MAKE THE DECISION
They saw a world on fire, and a world all perfect, and understood so much all at once.
“Both,” he yelled out.
BOTH
And the voice was louder than ever when it’s reply came out after a moment. And they were both in the desert now. And before them was as far as the eyes could see. Soldiers rotted and decayed. She was made of fire standing next to him. And he was wearing clothing he’d never seen and was cool in the hot desert.
“I didn’t mean for this.”
You saw it. You knew it.
“I didn’t mean it, I was wrong.” He was looking at her, crying, as she stared out at her army of the dead. He terrified of her fire ran to a little shed and grabbed a bucket of water sitting there as he heard her.
I didn’t decide it, you did. I’m the arbiter of all men’s fate.
He poured the water on her while she was talking and the fire went out and she was soaking wet. Screamed with surprise and her father looked at her all rotted, he sat in a jeep right in front of them, not the least bit concerned. She dripped. But began to steam, flowing off her, and she screamed an angry and horrible scream and fire came out of her eyes, and her hair turned into flames and rose up off her head. All brightly and fiery and fury. He was crying and afraid, mumbling to himself, and he started running away with the stone in his hand. He looked back and saw her made totally of fire again, and the dead were all sitting in their old jeeps and tanks with holes in them and all those old dead soldiers in their uniforms all tattered. He wants out. And is out.
He wakes in a forest and there was a great dome of white light to the West. He walks toward it. The stone is gone.
A random boy stumbled across an instant, while hiding behind a dumpster with the smell of hot trash engulfing him, where he wondered if Bone were presently running with AK-47s. He stood up keeping his head out of sight, below the brick wall surrounding the dumpster. He lifted his backpack onto his shoulder, crept to the edge of the wall and scanned the parking lot: pretty quiet. He sprinted from his hiding place across the parking lot towards a closed Starbucks. He picked up a river-rock sitting in a planter and threw it through the window. He knocked out a few standing pieces of glass from the huge window and stepped inside. An Alarm buzzed at him. He walked over to a small open-faced cooler and started grabbing muffins and water bottles. He took a bag from near the register and filled it. He removed the packaging from a poppy seed muffin and began eating it, relaxing in a small, thickly padded armchair. His legs and arms were sore and getting weak, he needed this food. The muffin was delicious, the water cool in his body, he sat in the chair his head leaning back, eating and drinking, his eyes closed.
A vibration in his pocket, pulled him from the rest, he answered it.
"Yea?"
"Where are you?"
"In a starbucks in Glendale, you?"
"Beverly Hills."
"Hey, Alex?
"Yea?"
"I shot a guy."
"Who?"
"Some thug, he pulled his piece on me, what could I do? Self-defense right?"
"Yea, self-defense, don't worry. Do you need to get picked up?"
"Yea, what's downtown like?"
"Crazy apparently, should we go?"
"Definitely."
"I'll call you when I get to Glendale."
"Roger." He hung up and replaced the phone in his pocket. He pulled the bandana off his head and wiped his damp hairline with his forearm. He felt exhausted, but he wanted to shout with excitement. He stood up and put the bandana back on his head, he paced around for a second and then stepped back out through the broken window. It was warm that night, he had sweat and begun to dry and begun to sweat again, he couldn't find the right temperature. He looked out and saw the hills and watched the light from them flicker and move; it was beautiful. He sighed and smiled. He began walking towards the dumpster again, to wait in the peace of the shadows at night.
He crouched down and lit a cigarette. He heard the sound of an engine, and saw lights passing against the walls and windows of the shopping center.
The boy was afraid. And the World was changing.
Came down on LA at sunset and beginning to fire and light everything up like daytime And the city is a panic crowd the roads and gets grenaded and shot up and bodies blown up on the sides of the roads not trying to run anymore
And she made fire torched the city screamed at that army so vast And they killed whatever they saw indiscriminate and she was serious all Bleeding out Bodies bleed out Cities bleed out Soldiers ate bodies and people screamed and ran A family ran across a street and stopped in the middle on the ground all bloody and dead with eyes hanging out of sockets and teeth on the ground The jeep with her father died in his uniform and buried years ago driving raced around and took people under it’s wheels And she put her hand on the head of a child and burned him all into ash like that while he cried
He walked to the dome of light came to the edge and didn’t dare touch it So threw a little rock that disappeared when it hit it And he sat down and thought He didn’t cry more Just thought about what this was and had no stone to show him anything or take him anywhere So must be the place He got up and put his hand on it and nothing happened and he couldn’t feel anything He put his hand through it and nothing So he walked through
Was in a city now Never seen like it before And saw plants growing all over and buildings like he never saw Couldn’t believe eyes Saw rain coming down in some places and not others and was way up in the dome and looked down and could see city all over All clean and all grey and green and no roads just paths And no dirt except where there was plants
He looked out over this at dawn seeing the city shine The empty city shine And he thought of her waging her war
No comments:
Post a Comment